“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I’m not sure about the universe.” (Albert Einstein)

Never felt so close to you as right now, Albert… Just couple of weeks ago I ranted on how tech bloggers are misjudging Google+ and now another moronic story has joined the idiocy choir. This time, it was posted in the king-maker blog, TechCrunch.

The story, by Alexia Tsotsis and Frederic Lardinois, is quoting one super-classified-secret-agent close source (let’s just call him “Double O Zero”) which says that Google has put on hold all Google+ related future acquisition. Agent 000 also adds that Google is cutting off the supply line to Google+, as the company supposedly is “wary”.

…pause for dramatic effect… (mysteriously cool music playing in the background)

Are you thrilled as I am right now? Can’t wait to see what will happen in this suspenseful story next… Then, TechCrunch’s “M” and her royal minion are suggesting that the company’s shot-in-the-leg is the result of the social networking service slacking.

…this could be an indication that Google+ isn’t doing quite as well as the company’s glowing public comments would indicate.

Ohhhh nnnnnnoooooo!!!! If the fellows in one of the most popular and reputable tech sites in the world have a speculation like this, then… there must be SOMETHING true in it! Because it isn’t possible that they are completely wrong, utterly distorted and living inside a Silicon Valley computerized bubble…

But wait a minute guys… We’ve just received a not-so-secret transmission… What’s that Mr. comScore? Google+ had nearly 111 million visitors from all around the world just in June? 66 percent growth since November 2011? That can’t be, because almighty TechCrunch just suggested that Google+ “isn’t doing quite as well…”

You know what Mr. comScore, visits don’t really say anything! It’s all about the user engagement levels… So unless you have anything to back this up, shut the fu… Oh, excuse me for a minute, just received another transmission, this time from Mr. BrightEdge… Google+’s user engagement RISING, you say… By 54 percent in two months, you say…

Oh, c’mon you guys! Now the TechCrunch folks looks really stupid!

Okay, maybe not REALLY stupid because Google perhaps truly stopped all acquisition regarding Google+. It’s not like they have just bought a social media developer company for enormous sum… Right…? –>>>TechCrunch article announcing Google have just bought a social media developer company for enormous sum.

The acquisition will allow Google to provide advanced software and services to brands who want to run contests, sweepstakes, branded games and more on Google+.

Shit. sorry madam Alexia and senior Frederic, I really tried not to make you look like a complete amateur reporters (okay, maybe just a bit) but you can at least comfort with one thing that special agent 000 reported and can turn out to be accurate:

…according to our source, the traditional Google+ Hawaii trip, is apparently still on the schedule.

YES!! The sky is falling on the social network but at least its employees will still get to have their own annual Hawaiian vacation! Right… Makes perfect sense.

Disclosure: Usually I’m a huge fan of Alexia Tsotsis. How can you not like a blogger that gives Forbes the finger?